By Dr Dave Schalow, PhD, CLU, ChFC, CFA, CFP

Part-Time Business Success | November 1, 2026

Negotiation often begins with a willingness to ask. A quoted price or proposed arrangement may be the starting point of a conversation, rather than the only possible outcome.

A few thoughtful questions can help you understand what matters to the other person and whether an agreement is possible. They aren't magic phrases, and they don't guarantee a discount.

PREPARE BEFORE YOU ASK

Know the result you want, the information you still need, and the point beyond which the deal no longer makes sense. Consider your alternatives so you aren't making the decision under unnecessary pressure.

Price is only one part of many agreements. Timing, quantity, service, payment terms, and the work included may matter just as much.

USE QUESTIONS TO LEARN

Here are several phrases to practice:

• “Is that the best you can do?”
• “What flexibility do you have on that?”
• “What would I need to do to make this arrangement work?”
• “Under these circumstances, would you consider this alternative?”
• “Have you ever made an exception to that policy?”
• “Which part of the proposal is most important to you?”

Ask respectfully, then give the person time to answer. If there is no flexibility, you have learned something useful. Don't turn the question into an attempt to embarrass or corner them.

AVOID NEGOTIATING AGAINST YOURSELF

It can be useful to understand the other person's expectations before changing your own offer. But “whoever gives a number first loses” is too rigid to be a universal rule. Preparation and context matter.

Before making a concession, find out what it would accomplish. A lower price that doesn't resolve the customer's real concern may simply reduce your margin.

LOOK FOR A FAIR EXCHANGE

A proposal such as “Could we agree to this price if I changed the delivery schedule?” connects a concession to something the other side values.

Splitting the difference can sometimes help close a gap, but it isn't automatically fair. The starting figures, the value being exchanged, and the terms still need to make sense.

KEEP THE CONVERSATION CALM

Listen carefully. Don't fill every silence with another concession. Stay friendly, explain your position clearly, and separate the terms from your feelings about the person.

Be willing to walk away when the arrangement doesn't meet your essential requirements. An agreement isn't a success merely because you reached one.

Practice on modest, appropriate situations first. Over time, you can become more comfortable asking for what you want while respecting the other person's right to say no.